Dating with adhd disorder
For years the diagnosis ratio of males to females was 10:1.
These days we’re looking at a slightly brighter 3:1.
Actually, it turns out that this conversational issue is famously common in the matchmaking industry.
It’s no surprise, I suppose, that this issue is so prevalent, considering that an estimated 4% of the population — or 8 million adults — have Attention-Deficit/Hyperactive Disorder (there’s no distinction between ADHD and the colloquially common “ADD” anymore), and that less than 20% of us have been diagnosed.
This piece is Katie’s Klabusich’s second dispatch from the front lines of her romantic life for the #Its Totally Me dating series, which follows Establishment writers Klabusich and Wagatwe Wanjuki as they utilize professional matchmakers and the insights of various experts to get to the bottom of their perpetual singledom.
“I’m so afraid of screwing up,” I told him, trying to keep my voice even, “with the ADHD stuff.
I’ll forget something or get it wrong or …” “Juuuuust chill out,” he interrupted, patting my knee in a fatherly sort of way. You’re just lazy.” His tone suggested this was a compliment.
You can read the series’ introductory post of matchmakers see a lot.”Emma Tessler of Dating Ring is the best I’ve ever encountered at gently explaining something the listener isn’t going to like and may even react disastrously to.
And right now, she’s being brutally honest about feedback she’s received from two very different people I’ve been set up with: a childhood friend of hers who I’d initially hit it off with, and a match who I was relatively sure through a text conversation before the date even happened wasn’t for me.“They both used the word ,” Emma tells me.
Difficulties with paying attention to others, missing important verbal and nonverbal cues, impulsively reacting or saying things that may be hurtful, moodiness, quick temper, low tolerance for frustrations, forgetfulness, zoning out in conversations, oversensitivity to criticism, emotional over-reactions, problems following through with commitments -- these are just some of the issues that make dating and maintaining positive relationships hard for an individual with ADD.